Sexual Harassment

Never take an under-the-table job from your neighbor. I did and I wish I didn’t. It was a neighbor who everyone in my immediate, close family knew. He seemed like a nice guy, so when he asked me to if I wanted a job, I was excited. First day was fine. Next day was normal. All I had to do was clean the floor, make some things for his spinning wheels, and other odd jobs. We talked about spirituality, books, music and the like. As the job went on, however, things got more and more hairy. I can’t remember when it exactly started, since this was the summer of ’08. I think it was after I divulged to him that I was bisexual and talked a little about sex. It wasn’t as bad as you think. I thought of him as a father figure than anything else. Then he said and kept saying to me on a daily basis that he could teach me a thing or two in the bedroom. It made me laugh because I thought he was joking. Later on (as the job went on), however he did ask me if I knew if it was all a joke. I was like, sure I do. *yack*

Anyway, when I went to work I used to wear good clothes not terrible but okay. I took shower and everything. But after he started asking me to go to bed with him and telling me that I “looked good” I decided to skip the shower and just be in my pajama pants and a crappy, oversized shirt. With this another thing annoying thing kept vomiting out of his lips. He had a small dog, named Jack, who incidentally liked me more than a friend, too. When I played with him, like all dogs, he smelled me, in the you-know-where. Gil (the guy’s name) said to me, “Ohhhhhhhhhhh he likes that.” Oh great another awkward moment from the crazy guy I am working for. He asked me if I liked to be sensual. I said, very nervously, “No not really, I am very ticklish.” Then he said, “Oh, that would be great for you-know-what.” *puke*

Before all this craziness happened, when things were normal, Gilbert asked me if I wanted to go to Portland. I was stuck at home so I decided that I did. He didn’t say anything to me nor did anything at the time that we were there. We went shopping for groceries, we went to the Doctor’s office, and we went out to eat. When we got home however, things got so hairy to the point that I was scared and didn’t know what to do. He tried to kiss me and did. I don’t mean on the cheek. Fortunately it was a peck. Not a full-blown make out session. He blocked me from leaving and leaned on in to my face and asked me for a kissed. It was disgusting. After I had no idea what to do. I was so confused. My mother reacts badly to things and my father, well, never make that guy angry at you. I was so worried that my father and possibly my sister’s boyfriend, who loves me as his own, would do something that they would regret. And what about leaving? Just leave, like that? No one going to understand me just up and leaving all of a sudden. One day I felt very uncomfortable around my employer. At that time I was all-of-a-sudden gushing over an old friend of mine from High School who I found on the internet. We were talking about meeting up and hanging out. I was taking care of Gil’s wood pile, obviously dreaming about my new crush.

Eventually that crush became a relationship (I am with the same guy). I told Gil about my boyfriend and all of a sudden, just like that, he let me go. I did tell my parents and it leaked through to my family. Everybody was on my side, (well yeah!!!) but, as my Mother said, we didn’t have enough evidence to take him to court.
I really don’t know why I didn’t tell anyone at the time. Now I know why women don’t say anything about their abuse, or assault or harassment. It something that’s unexpected and just plain wrong. And now I am breaking the silence.