About a year ago and from then on I was going through a spiritual crisis. I felt that the term ‘witch’ was threatening and loaded. I had never felt this before about the word “witch”. I had always enjoyed it. Why I had felt like this was two reasons: My boyfriend and academia. My boyfriend and I had a conversation about my spiritual label one day when we were first going out, of course it was Halloween. He said, “Witch means an evil, bent, screwy woman, why would you call yourself that?” And at that point in my life I was getting into more of an academic and conservative standing. I read books about the Salem Witch trials and a mix of other historical witchcraft books. Not soon after I had began my year-long journey of changing labels. Six months after my conversation with my partner I didn't see Witchcraft as something evil anymore I was more into just trying to describe my religious practice to everyone else. I was protecting it by putting "safe" labels in front of the word Witch. I felt that each one didn’t describe me to my fullest. I was just digging myself into a hole, and it felt like I was never returning. I have felt distracted and distanced from my magical practice. It was hard for me to focus. I haven't done any real ritual or spell for a while. I felt disconnected every time I sat next to my altar. Then I thought: “I had a path way back then and now I need to gain it back."
Then I realized, I can’t be looking back all the time wondering where all my witchiness ran off to. I need push onwards. I need to grow; I need to sprout (cliché I know), I need to fly. I need to move on. The only reason why my spirituality went to the dogs is because I wasn't practicing. I was too busy changing labels. At this point I am over the word “witch” being evil. To me it means one who utilizes ritual, spell casting, divination, and energy work in their meaningful spiritual, magical practice in order to achieve a goal. I am not going to listen to my boyfriend again about Pagan spirituality. I love being a Witch. If someone else thinks the word is to “evil” that’s their problem.
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